Kickass

Kickass and 33,580 days

Kickass, the doorstop dog, aware that math is not the keeper’s strong suit, nonetheless accepts his calculation that the sun rose this morning on the 33,824thday of his life and it promises to be a great one in that he is upright, “taking solids” and to the best of his knowledge is not wanted by the law.

With the average human life span having only 28,835 days that puts the keeper ahead of the game by 4,989 days and counting.

Imagine that–the keeper is among the “game” leaders! The last time that happened he was a teenage dragracer and got a speeding ticket.

On the morning of this 33,824th day of his life, the keeper plans a brief celebratory dance with Phyllis in front of the refrigerator where she will tell him to eat oatmeal as he reaches for bacon and eggs.

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