Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper and Phyllis recently hiked that part of the Ice Age Trail that winds along the ridges of the UW University Ridge Golf Course; and noted what a splendid example of shared use of valued recreational real estate it is, the trail winding between the fairways as it does. The experience revived the keeper’s long-held, if not often-scorned, contention that in this age of intense demands on property near population centers, cemeteries should be opened to golfing.
Ignoring the potential for standing the “hole in one” phrase on its head as in “one in a hole,” golfing in a traditional cemetery with its great variety of granite tombstones would produce the kind of exciting, ricocheting bounces to warm the hearts of even the most hapless duffers.
Some special gear might be required—like the metal armor worn by knights of old, but equipment concerns have never been a deterrent to golfers who long ago brought in carts to eliminate the health benefits of walking.
The concept of “par” would, of course have to be revised in cemetery golfing, but that is appropriate since it would be impossible for a cemetery golfer to even guess when he might score his final “one in a hole.” The keeper is thinking that should he have the opportunity to “play” a round of cemetery golf, par of at least 100 seems fitting considering his current tally.