Kickass and handshake replacement

Kickass, the doorstop dog, is working with the keeper to replace the handshake as a social gesture of greeting less conducive to spreading the Coronaviras; and cautions at the outset that no replacement meet-greet gesture will be even remotely patterned from the behavior of dogs meeting and greeting each other.

In attempting to stick with a no-contact gesture, the keeper discarded raised middle fingers as carrying too much mental garbage, and also rejected the thumb-to-the-nose-and-wiggled fingers for the same reason.

The elbow bump is awkward onto impossible with a drink in hand, and a raised fist tends to be taken as an invitation to a fist fight.  Simply waving at another person is confusing and often interpreted as “goodbye” instead of hello.

In the end, the keeper is suggested a simple smile and a nod as a handshake replacement.  Smiles are easy and accompanied by a nod, tell the other person you approve of them to the extent of being in the same room with them—but it reserves the unspoken “DO NOT TOUCH” implication.

(Among those where kissing is the accepted form of greeting, the use of either surgical masks or dog-type muzzles is recommended.)