Kickass and lost remote
Kickass, the doorstop dog, passes along the following fact: The average American spends two and one-half days annually looking for lost items, resulting in a $2.7 billion replacement cost. Kickass also notes that from a sheer entertainment point of view, the antics of the keeper and Phyllis in their prolonged search for the small TV remote would have had commercial potential except for its lack of originality.
Being nothing more than a variation on that old theme of grandpa being unable to find the eyeglasses that are on his forehead, the missing remote saga began unexpectedly in the middle of dinner prep and was complete with exchanged accusations about who last had the remote and in its extreme included Phyllis looking in the freezer and the keeper searching under the bed, though he had not been in the bedroom since early morning.
“Look in your pockets,” Phyllis said and the keeper complied, finding only the usual pants pocket junk and the search went on, gaining intensity and heading toward hopeless mystery.
And then it was suddenly over as Phyllis eyeballed the keeper and said, “It’s in your shirt pocket!”
The keeper thought better of accusing Phyllis of putting the remote in his shirt pocket, and humbly accepted responsibility just in time to mute a commercial for memory aid medication.