Kickass

Kickass and Mt. RushmoreKickass, the doorstop dog, admits that it was inevitable that he would use his unique powers of communication to overhear a conversation between the four presidential images on Mt. Rushmore: Washington: “Who the hell is that guy with the funny hair?” Lincoln: “As the one who started the country, George, you should know that he is the one who may end it.” Jefferson: “He says he is great and he wants to be up here with us.” Roosevelt: “If he gets up here, I’m leaving. I hear he wants to sell Yellowstone.” Washington: “When you’ve been stoned as long as we have you hear and see strange things, but why aren’t those people with the orange-haired one wearing coronavirus masks?” Lincoln: “You know, George, that childhood, cherry-tree story about you not being able to tell a lie, well, the orange haired one cannot tell anything but lies, and he tells people it doesn’t matter if they get sick and die so long as they vote for him.” Jefferson: “I hear he grabs women indecently, ridicules the handicapped, makes racist remarks and believes money is god.” Roosevelt: “Well, nobody, including us four, is perfect: George has bird crap on his nose again, and there is also some on Teddy’s forehead and on Abe’s ear.” Washington: “The crows are the worst. Maybe if they put the orange-haired one up here they will target him.” Lincoln: “Not worth the risk. I’d rather be crapped on by eagles!”

Kickass, the doorstop dog, admits that it was inevitable that he would use his unique powers of communication to overhear a conversation between the four presidential images on Mt. Rushmore:

Washington: “Who the hell is that guy with the funny hair?”

Lincoln: “As the one who started the country, George, you should know that he is the one who may end it.”

Jefferson: “He says he is great and he wants to be up here with us.”

Roosevelt: “If he gets up here, I’m leaving. I hear he wants to sell Yellowstone.”

Washington: “When you’ve been stoned as long as we have you hear and see strange things, but why aren’t those people with the orange-haired one wearing coronavirus masks?”

Lincoln: “You know, George, that childhood, cherry-tree story about you not being able to tell a lie, well, the orange haired one cannot tell anything but lies, and he tells people it doesn’t matter if they get sick and die so long as they vote for him.”

Jefferson: “I hear he grabs women indecently, ridicules the handicapped, makes racist remarks and believes money is god.”

Roosevelt:  “Well, nobody, including us four, is perfect: George has bird crap on his nose again, and there is also some on Teddy’s forehead and on Abe’s ear.”

Washington: “The crows are the worst.  Maybe if they put the orange-haired one up here they will target him.”

Lincoln: “Not worth the risk. I’d rather be crapped on by eagles!”

 

 

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