Kickass

Kickass and Nunig the polar bear

Kickass, the doorstop dog, joined the keeper in assisting with the transfer of Nunig, the four-year-old polar bear from Madison’s Vilas Park Zoo to the Kansas City, Mo. Zoo where he—Nunig, will join “Berlin,” a 31-year-old female as part of what zoo people call a “Polar Bear Survival Plan.”

The transfer, which occurs today, was made largely without serious consultation with Nunig, but by using his usual devious ways, Kickass was able to obtain an “in-zoo” interview, here-to-for classified as “secret.” The contents revealed the following comments by Nunig:

“With winter coming, Wisconsin is no fit place for a polar bear!

“I would have gone farther south—maybe Florida, but the dating service I was using found this lonesome older female-“Berlin” in Kansas City and we’re going to give things a try.  She sounds interesting, in a “cougar” sort of way.

“The fact that Wisconsin is a hot-bed of the coronavirus helped make the decision to move, since polar bears do not like “hot-beds” of anything.

“I will miss Madison, but not the political scene which is much more of a zoo than any polar bear should ever be asked to tolerate.

“So, goodbye Wisconsin, and KANSAS CITY HERE I COME!

“I hope “Berlin” likes to cuddle!”

 

 

 

 

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