Kickass and ron johnson

Kickass, the doorstop dog, reveals the keeper’s plan for how Wisconsin residents can not only survive, but actually thrive during the remainder of Sen. Ron Johnson’s term in office.  Called the “Johnson Flush,” the keeper’s plan does not rely on such questionable things as “coffee enemas”, which have been linked to several deaths, but instead adds the brain end of the body to condition a Wisconsin resident to think of his/her daily bowel movement as a “Johnson Flush.”

Such a mindset not only keeps the reality of Johnson in place, but gives Wisconsin citizens the vague impression, however imaginative, of doing something about it on a daily basis.

While it may be true that the bowel becomes more of a command organ with age, this is no reason to put age constraints on the keeper’s plan to label their functioning as “Johnson Flushes.”

There is, in the keeper’s assessment, an image of great statewide potential political power in all of the Wisconsin citizens thinking of Ron Johnson every day as they sit on the John. (Could it be relabeled “The Ron.”)

A canine application of the plan would have dog-walkers reaching for the leash and saying, “Come on, Spot: Time for your Johnson Flush.”

As usual, the keeper points to his boundless modesty as reason for restraint in celebrating the introduction of his “Johnson Flush” survival plan.  And now, if he can be excused, he needs to go sit in his “office” and think about you-know-who!







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