Kickass and smart men

Kickass, the doorstop dog, received a detailed report from the keeper about the all-day outing that he and three other relics of another time built around attending a Brewers baseball game.  The game itself was noteworthy in part because it was played inside away from the cold Milwaukee rain, and second because the Milwaukee pitcher performed as if he were throwing batting practice for the visiting team.  But what really impressed the keeper was the incredible depth and breadth of the problem solving that occurred as these four old dudes were confined to their vehicle as it took them to and fro.  It is an obvious verity that once a certain age is reached, most men—why not women?–wake up one morning with the realization that they know almost everything there is to know and they are happy to pass on any part of that vast store of knowledge in the interests of solving the problems of the world as well as those of its inhabitants.  Put four of these self-enlightened men together and you have a bottomless well of solutions.  Unfortunately, like too many wells these days—especially those in places like Wisconsin’s Kewaunee County, this well is also subject to contamination by cow and bull shit, mostly the latter.  But, damn, it was a fun day, and if it had all been recorded, the UN could close up shop, the White House would be converted into a chicken coop, and one of the four participants would eventually come up with the identity of that guy they talked about for fifteen minutes or so but couldn’t remember his name.