Kickass and the dodo bird
Kickass, the doorstop dog, occasionally loses total control of the keeper’s inclination to venture into areas where his—the keeper’s, powers of observation and analysis are not above average, and such is the case with recent alleged occurrences at his bird feeder. It was one thing for him to claim regular visitation by a passenger pigeon which went extinct in 1914, but he-the keeper, is now convinced that there are visits by the dodo bird—which went extinct in th 17th century. The dodo bird visits are usually nocturnal and are unmistakably identified by an offensive tweeting call that, unlike all over bird calls, leaves behind a residue that at first had the keeper thinking the bird feeder was being visited by a bull. The presence of the dodo bird, in addition to leaving behind bull-like droppings that are virtually impossible to clean up, carries with it a rotten-eggs odor similar to that of various gasses, and which encourages unpleasant thoughts and an urge to get the hell out of wherever you happen to be and seek some fresh air. The keeper—and Kickass, further claim that if you do not think the dodo bird is visiting your bird feeder, you are not paying attention. Just listen for the absurd tweeting and check for the stink.