Kickass and the one cent account
Kickass, the doorstop dog, notes that Sunday being a day for stepping back to figure out if you have enough gruel to survive the coming week, the keeper spent time reading over the monthly statement from Ameritrade which shows a balance of “0.01.” The two-page statement—showing that one cent balance, has been arriving in a 6 by 9 windowed envelope for several years, ever since the keeper closed out an account that must have brought the financial world to its knees but that returned barely enough to buy a used boat.
The statement keeps repeating that the “estimated yield” is .04% but the balance remains at one cent so something is amiss.
So if Ameritrade is doing this just to keep the keeper’s name on some kind of a list, he wants some explanation as to why the hell his 0.01 account is not growing—or shrinking. And how would he handle this matter if he were the kind who “tithed” which he is not, but it’s something to think about on Sunday.