Kickass, the doorstop dog, says that while it is true that a dog did not eat the Mueller Report—since no self respecting dog would ever set paw in the current White House, there is speculation that the report is being held up by the combination of a Mexican Hairless and a French Poodle, embarrassingly conjoined in that canine post-coitus posture in the Rose Garden. While nobody is absolutely sure how the Hairless and the Poodle managed to get together in the Rose Garden, there is thought to be secret testimony from fixer Cohen that when his boss asked him to set up a meeting between Mexico and France this is how it came to be structured. Cohen also testified that his boss was pleased by the sight of the two conjoined dogs and wrote a check to the American Kennel Club for $70,000 with the proviso that it—the club, consider him at the next Westminster event for best-in-show. In the meantime, Republican senators—like McConnell, have been called to view the conjoined Rose Garden dogs and have solemnly proclaimed them to be in the best interests of the American public and not related in any way to any Russian Wolf Hounds.
(See billstokesauthor.com for more Kickass and news of the novel MARGARET’S WAR.)