Kickass

Kickass and voice of gravity

Kickass, the doorstop dog, commends the keeper for his discovery of “the voice of gravity,” and wonders if his name will now be associated with the likes of Newton and Einstein and the other great gravity thinkers that have preceded him?

It happened accidentally, as so many great discoveries do, when the keeper heard a voice as he struggled to get up out of his recliner after a lengthy session there.

            “Where the hell do you think you are going and why?” the voice said. “I am the force of gravity and everything you do is subject to my approval.”

            In response to the keeper’s question, the voice of gravity went on to say that the reason it had not been discovered before was that nobody had really listened for it as the keeper is now doing on a daily if not minute by minute basis.

            “Listen up,” the voice said, “Remember when I let you get upright from your baby-creeping days and how you and everyone around you celebrated the gravity defying event?

            “And think of the many times I saved your fanny when you did stupid things like jump out of the treehouse or fell off your bicycle?”

            The keeper sensing the obvious desire for recognition in the voice of gravity, expressed appreciation for not having taken a damaging fall as so many of his friends have recently done.

            The voice of gravity, obviously pleased with the keeper’s recognition, said, “My friends call me Grav, See you around.”

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