Kickass and Walmart guns


Kickass, the doorstop dog, observes that since it now comes down to the Church of Walmart—that great destroyer of  small town America with its evangelizing of cheapness–making the initial move toward gun control, it follows that all meaningful social and moral alterations will henceforth be guided totally by the profit motive and the faithful worshipers of cheap Chinese junk and monopoly pricing.  That requires some revision of the Commandments:  One—Thou shall have no other gods before money.  Two—Thou shall use credit cards as idols.  Three—Thou shall not swear at the Walmart greeter.  Four—Thou shall remember Walmart is open on the Sabbath.  Five—Thou shall drop mom and dad off at Walmart in the morning and pick them up later in the day.  Six—Thou shall not kill anyone, even a Walmart shopper holding up the checkout line.  Seven—Thou shall not commit sex in a Walmart store with anyone other than a wife or a husband.  Eight—Thou shall not shoplift at Walmart as there are security cameras everywhere.  Nine—Thou shall not tell lies while at Walmart lest you be elected POTUS.  Ten—Thou shall not covet the Walton family money—enough to buy Greenland, Africa, and the Northern Hemisphere, even though some of that money was once yours.  If you had it back you would probably just spend it at Walmart, again.



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

eleven − three =