Kickass antlers

Kickass, the doorstop dog, watching the deer in the field below the house—all antlerless this time of year, ponders the phenomenon of antler size as a status symbol for hunters.  Unable to make a meaningful contribution on the subject, he resorts to speculation:

I don’t shoot a deer for meat?

I go to McDonalds if I want to eat.

I hunt out in the cold and snow.

To get some antlers I can show.

I do not know the reason why

I just know the buck must die

So I can claim for all to hear,

I killed the biggest antlered deer.

Its head is up there on the wall,

My ego too, glass eyes and all.