Kickass camps on the couch
Kickass, the doorstop dog, with all of the wisdom of a cast iron creature, will be staying home as the keeper and Phyllis head out in the lion-hunting motor home to “camp” in Door County. It is a commonly held historical/biological belief that dogs inserted themselves into humans’ lives by sidling into the proximity of early cave campfires. That was a good move by the dogs since the humans learned about hammers and nails and built themselves outlandishly comfortable dwellings that came complete with central heating and couches. Ah yes, couches. But then something totally unexpected happened to the humans and they began to “go camping,” Why in god’s name they would do this is mind boggling—dog mind boggling. Think of it: abandon the warm, dry houses and the couches for a plot of bare ground to sleep on a leaky air mattress with ten thousand mosquitoes demanding blood and rain threatening! The motor home is a step up from primitive camping, but it is still camping, and Kickass is having none of it, thank you. He is smarter than that, and he wonders if there is a serious short in the DNA double helix and Darwin should get off his dead ass and fix it.