Kickass cancelles a week

Kickass, the doorstop dog, is cooperating with the keeper in cancelling next week due to weather.  With a forecast for two winter-quality storms dumping ice and snow on the area and bringing freezing temperatures, there is simply no good reason to have next week.  It is therefore ordered that, in line with the daylight savings formula, the calendar is to be moved ahead one week which will make Monday Nov. 4 instead of Oct. 28.  The lost week will be recovered some time next spring about the time the lilacs blossom.  Instead of the “Spring ahead, fall back” formula for the daylight saving scheme, the guiding phrase for cancelling a wintry week in October will be, “Spring out the door, Fall on your ass.”