Kickass Catfishing identity
Kickass, the doorstop dog, having learned that “catfishing” is using a false on-line identity to impress someone–frequently for purposes of meeting/mating, would hereby like to clarify once and for all that he is a cast-iron dog with no brain, no heart and no reason to be taken for a walk. These characteristics, of course, make the Kickass identity susceptible to catfishing by others, particularly those in politics.
The test to insure that you are dealing with the real Kickass is to kick your computer as hard as you can, perhaps during a Trump I-love-me-speech. If you break your foot, you are in touch with the genuine brainless Kickass who applauds your action.
If, on the other hand, your kick misses and you fall on your ass in front of the computer, you are a victim of “catfishing,” and can probably expect to get a fund-raising call from the Roy Moore people, or maybe from Bannon.