Kickass gets smashed
Kickass, the doorstop dog, is cooperating with the keeper as he launches a personal campaign to nip-in-the bud the possibility that he might unjustly be described as lurching about the house in a drunken stupor simply because, while replenishing the refrigerator for thirsty grandsons, he dropped an unopened bottle of beer and it smashed on the tile floor leaving an interesting blend of glass shards in a large pool of sticky beer. This then was followed within the hour–as he prepared a token gift for a neighbor party host, by his knocking an unopened bottle of Prairie Flume off the kitchen counter for an even more spectacular display of broken glass in an even greater alcoholic beverage sea.
With this kind of a streak going, the keeper wondered if he did not have the basic qualifications to become chief of staff for the Orange Narcissist in the White House, experienced as he is in mopping up sticky, jagged messes that if left in place would make it impossible for even a dog to walk through the house and would ultimately offend any potential visitors, official or otherwise..
It is this kind of heavy duty thinking that gets the keeper through the day, that and the fact that his personal supply of Korbels brandy is in a smash-proof plastic bottle.