Kickass, the doorstop dog, is observing very carefully as the keeper and Phyllis try various means to control the barking of the small schnauzer type—“Boo” that shares the premises and considers it her duty to announce to visitors that this—by god—is her place and you had better act accordingly. In addition to a shock collar, which may or may not be effective, the keeper found a device that, when it senses barking noise, emits a high frequency sound that is inaudible to humans but apparently so impresses a barking dog that it shuts up. It is for outdoor use only, which is too bad since the keeper immediately thought of the application of such a device for the White House. At least there should be one out in the Rose Garden. Kickass notes that Boo maintains her hold on the household, in part because she can play the piano—a small child’s model on which she performs in return for dog treats. The current occupant of the White House has no such redeeming value, and the only thing better than fitting him with a shock collar to shut him up would be getting them on Mitch McConnell and the rest of the Repub bandits.