Kickass, the doorstop dog, was on deck recently when a robin stopped briefly on the balcony of the Madison apartment where the keeper and Phyllis live; and he—Kickass, took the opportunity to use his special communication powers to engage the robin in a conversation about tweeting.
Kickass: “So why do you tweet?”
Robin: “To attract a sex partner and to tell other male robins to stay the hell away.”
Kickass: “So how is it that your tweeting has been interpreted as ‘Cheer up, Cheer up’?”
Robin: “Facebook did it! They said our tweeting was too salacious and they slapped that inane interpretation on it.
Kickass: “Some birds tweet annoyingly at night. What do you suggest?”
Robin: “Create a disturbance to discourage bird roosting within earshot. Close the windows and turn up the radio.”
Kickass: “Do you have any suggestions for dealing with an out-of-control human tweeter?”